I sense there’s something in the wind
That feels like tragedy’s at hand
And though I’d like to stand by her
Can’t shake this feeling that I have
The worst is just around the bend
When exactly does it shift from friendship to love ??
we were dear friends ,but I’ve fallen love with her and I thought she did too , for a moment.
But soon she realized it wasn’t love ,just the feling of being loved and that my friends doesn’t last long .
And does she notice my feelings for her?
And will she see how much she means to me?
I think it’s not to be
It was/is my first love ,I’ve never loved anybody else ,but I can’t force anybody into loving me .
With so much pride and self reservation I played Joey of friends smiling and saying ” Hey you know me I’m a loner in the first place, Where is my cakes you was talking about ? “
But is hurts like hell inside, Don’t recall being tormented like that in my entire life.
What will become of my dear friend
Where will her actions lead us then?
Although I’d like to join the crowd
In their enthusiastic cloud
Try as I may, it doesn’t last
I tried to take it easy ,play along and see may be she’ll return ,but she didn’t .
she fell in love with another guy .
Being her best friend I had to know him and go out with both of them .
can’t even begin to describe a feeling like that , me laughing joking and acting happy while seeing her with another guy holding hands :S .
And will we ever end up together?
No, I think not, it’s never to become
For I am not the one
to make the long story short, it was one of my lowest point that i’ve reached in my entire life .
I had two choices, One was to run away and distant myself from her as soon as possible to allow myself to recover, but that means we’ll never be friends again .. ever .
The other was to face reality and deal with it : SHE IS NOT AND NEVER WILL BE MINE .
it’s hard .. very hard .
But I took that path and walked it to the end ,sufferd a lot though and still suffering to a degree .
But we are still friends …. best friends and I got to understand ,digest and deal with reality .
now I’ve recoverd very well , feel much better about the issue and very comfortable about my choices that i’ve made
All I wanted to say, If you love someone stand by their side it’s worth it .
so to make long stories short , I’m putting them down in a list :
I’ve fallen in love with a girl (my best friend)
She has fallen in love with me
after a while we (she) found out that being friends is better than being lovers . and I respected that .
now we are more than friends ,but not lovers (can’t be defined) and I kinda like it .
my dad had 4 surgeries till now after his car accident.
Both my mother and my little sister wore Niqab by there own decision despite being opposed by me and my dad (me mostly) ,but hey ,it’s there life -decision not mine.
I sill feel lonely as hell (not as i used to be ,but not a lot better actually)
Met some very interesting people including an American Jew friend who lives here in Alexandria , too bad he is leaving soon .
I get sick easily recently for no obvious reason on why is this happening more frequently than usual .
I switched from Ubuntu to OpenSUSE 11.1 and reverted back as usual .
I had my first kiss :$
I finished my 2nd term in my final year and SUCKED at the exams (rabena yostor)
I don’t like where I stand right now on any level ,but i’ll try to work it out .
That’s all I can remember right now ,may be i’ll write details in another posts.
god, I’m glade that I finally put something on the blog .
Welcome to my personal free zone .. this is where i say it all with no barriers or limits away from community hypocrisy.
I'm an Egyptian Middle Eastern Liberal "NON-TERRORIST, for you prejudicial assholes " lonely guy who loves open source software ..
About me ...